We recently had the chance to connect with Ashley Kelsch and have shared our conversation below.
Ashley, really appreciate you sharing your stories and insights with us. The world would have so much more understanding and empathy if we all were a bit more open about our stories and how they have helped shaped our journey and worldview. Let’s jump in with a fun one: Who are you learning from right now?
As cliche as this may sound, I’m learning from my children Nick (25) and Faith (22). right now I’ve spent the last 5 or more years watching them weigh out the cost between pursing their passions in the arts vs settling into something that is ‘secure’. I see in them a conviction, excitement and fearlessness that, in Midlife, I sometimes lose sight of. I have ‘experience’ of going after what I want and taking risks, no doubt, but with that experience comes the reminders of what didn’t work, why this might not be a good idea and so on. In watching them, I’m reminded that none of that matters. Having a beginners mindset and the willingness to show up and try regardless of any outcome does.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I help women close the gap between not drinking and actually living—especially in midlife when everything else seems to be unraveling at the same time. I’m a certified recovery coach specializing in wholeness-based work for women navigating their relationship with alcohol. Whether you’re questioning your drinking, trying to quit, or sober but still struggling emotionally, I work with the patterns underneath your choices, not just the symptoms.
Before becoming a coach eight years ago, I owned Teddies for Bettys, a lingerie and sexual wellness boutique here in Austin for a decade. Sitting with women in those dressing rooms taught me more about shame, desire, fear, bodies, and emotional truth than any credential ever could. It trained me to hold space for the parts we’re taught to hide—skills I rely on every day in my coaching practice.
My work integrates three core modalities: thought work (how your internal narrative shapes your feelings and outcomes), pattern work (the emotional and behavioral loops you’ve been living out, often for years), and nervous system regulation (because cravings, urges, and reactivity live in the body, not the intellect).
I work with women across a wide spectrum: those questioning their drinking, those who want to quit but keep slipping, and those who are alcohol-free but still feel overwhelmed, reactive, or disconnected. Many of my clients look “fine” on the outside while feeling fractured on the inside, cycling between coping mechanisms or white-knuckling their way through life.
My approach isn’t rule-based or compliance-driven. I’m not here to police your behavior. I’m here to help you understand the root patterns driving it. The goal isn’t to fix you—it’s to help you return to yourself.
I currently offer three coaching pathways: Rethinking Drinking, Choosing Sobriety, and Emotional Sobriety & Wholeness, each designed for a different stage of the journey. I also write two Substack newsletters—This Side of Sober and Unfucking Midlife—because most women navigating alcohol also find themselves navigating midlife, identity, and reinvention at the same time.
Okay, so here’s a deep one: What was your earliest memory of feeling powerful?
By the time I was 19, I had reached a place with my drinking and drug use where if it continued, I would likely die. The only idea I could come up with was to get as far away from the party as possible. So I got a one-way ticket to Maui. (Spoiler alert: there is always a party for those who like to party.)
There I was, physically, mentally, and emotionally broken, in the most remote, beautiful place I’d ever seen, surrounded by the most active, healthy lifestyles I’d ever witnessed. For the first time in my life, I saw people of all ages running, swimming, surfing, and biking. Something deep in me wanted to feel what they were feeling.
That something told me to start running, and for the first time, it wasn’t from myself or my problems. I’ll never forget the day the walk-run turned into a full four-mile run. I walked in my door and said out loud, “I’m going to run a marathon at the end of the year.” I had never felt more invincible or sure of myself. For the first time in my life, I was in my body, feeling all of it, and using it to benefit me.
Twenty-five years later, that remains true. The only difference is that the feeling of powerful has shifted to a feeling of home.
If you could say one kind thing to your younger self, what would it be?
/you won’t regret the tattoos, but you won’t want most of them by the time you reach 40.
Alright, so if you are open to it, let’s explore some philosophical questions that touch on your values and worldview. What important truth do very few people agree with you on?
That having a pleasure practice and/or an orgasm a day is a vital part of your overall health and well-being.
Okay, so before we go, let’s tackle one more area. What are you doing today that won’t pay off for 7–10 years?
Spending time on social media, checking emails and stat looping. It’s a time suck that pulls us out of the present moment offering nothing in return.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.ashleykelsch.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/unfuckingmidlife
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ashley-kelsch-81a699171/
Image Credits
Crissy Fisher
Ricky Clack
