Today we’d like to introduce you to Emilia Dewi.
Hi Emilia, please kick things off for us with an introduction to yourself and your story.
My story begins a bit before the actual chapter unfolds. I have been an occupational therapist specializing in neurological rehabilitation, lymphedema management, and cancer rehabilitation for over 11 years. I got introduced to the world of rehabilitation when my dad had a stroke in 1999 and never fully regained his mobility. His personality also shifted after his brain injury, and I didn’t understand why as a 15-year-old. When he passed away in 2005, I had so much regret, and his story inspired me to become an occupational therapist because I wanted to help heal individuals who had similar struggles to my dad since I couldn’t help him. I was introduced to the world of cancer rehabilitation a few years after I became an OT. I specialized in lymphedema management, and many of my patients were women who went through breast cancer treatment. I learned their stories and their struggles, and they motivated me to learn more about creative ways to help them manage their symptoms – from scar tissue, fatigue, and radiation fibrosis to adjustment after having cancer.
Little did I know I would have my own personal healing journey from cancer starting in 2020. In November 2020, I found a small lump in my left breast while in the infrared sauna doing a lymphatic drainage technique. I was 36 at the time, and although I saw so many stories about breast cancer, I never thought that I would be the one who had to get the diagnosis. I waited a couple of months before I got a mammogram and ultrasound. I kept thinking that this may be a cyst. I was scared, and I didn’t want to believe that I had to go through what my patients had. My doctor originally wanted me to wait another 6 months before referring me to get scans. However, I pushed her back because I just had to know. February 1, 2021 – I had my first ultrasound and mammogram. The radiologist who reviewed the result said it didn’t look good. She wanted me to have a biopsy right away. 4 days later, I had my biopsy, and 4-5 days later, I got a call that I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I still remember that day I got the phone call at my lunch break, and my world fell apart. Cancer – I couldn’t believe that I now had to endure the treatment that I was terrified of since I knew all the side effects and the struggles that came with that. 3 years later, I am still in treatment but now for metastatic cancer. In March, I had a liver mass (20×6 cm), my lungs were full of cancer cells that were “too numerous to count,” and I had 5 cancerous spots in my bones. I couldn’t swallow anything for 10 days and was hospitalized. I started chemo that fateful March weekend.
Fast forward to now, my liver mass is 4.7×1.6 cm, and my lungs and bones are clear and regular. I am still undergoing treatment, but I can tell you that I feel 100% better, and I am not afraid of cancer anymore. In this last year, I healed so much physically and emotionally and learned from my cancer journey that my diagnosis helped me heal much deeper than the cancer diagnosis. I am more at peace, let go of things easily, and learned to value myself. My relationship with my family (especially my mom) is also healing. My mom and I have been through a lot, and her actions used to trigger me (even when she meant well). We had no disagreements during the last two short visits with her; we both healed and changed. It took 39 years to get to this place, but I will tell you that I am much happier today!
Can you talk to us about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned? Looking back, has it been easy or smooth in retrospect?
This healing journey is smooth and has many bumps along the road. When I got diagnosed, I didn’t want to do any conventional therapy (chemo, radiation, or surgery). I saw what it did to my patients, and I was scared of experiencing all their symptoms (as a rehab professional, I tend to see the worst-case scenarios, so I was biased and skewed in my judgment. I explored many pathways, natural healing from coffee enemas, food change, supplements, wellness technologies, and anything but the traditional treatment. I hung on to every success story from natural treatment and wanted to make that my victory and story. I checked all the boxes and tried to control my situation. At first, it was getting better. I could feel the lump was getting smaller, but that was short-lived and grew more prominent.
For another year after that, I went through the same cycle – looking for the latest testimony or healing methods; things improved for a bit, but then it went back to worsening. By September 2022, I had a lump that covered my entire left breast and protruded through my skin. I walked around with a wound care supply since the scabs on my skin were bleeding daily. I knew that surgery was imminent, and at that point, that was the only thing that I was willing to pursue. I went to Tijuana and had a mastectomy worth flat closure and skin graft because the doctors in the US didn’t want to touch me without doing chemotherapy first.
At that time, I received messages from people who prayed for me and thought about me. The message was clear – my subconscious didn’t want to survive – so I had to embrace the hard things or give up consciously. During that time, I realized that the programming inside my head was self-hatred and self-pity. I believed for so long that I wasn’t good enough and that no one could love me. That was why I subconsciously didn’t want to live anymore. That experience was a big wake-up call – if I wanted to heal and thrive – I needed to surrender my plan to control my life. I needed to let go of my judgment and opinions of what is good and bad. For years, I judged Western medicine as evil because of what I saw. I was scared of its side effects. Later, I realized that allopathic and holistic medicine go hand in hand. I can use what I learned through holistic medicine to detox and support my body to stay strong during my allopathic treatments. I started to pray for my chemo and said to my medicine that I received all the benefits and let go of all the adverse side effects.
At that time, I received messages from people who prayed for me and thought about me. The message was clear – my subconscious didn’t want to survive – so I had to embrace the hard things or give up consciously. During that time, I realized that the programming inside my head was self-hatred and self-pity. I believed for so long that I wasn’t good enough and that no one could love me. That was why I subconsciously didn’t want to live anymore. That experience was a big wake-up call – if I wanted to heal and thrive – I needed to surrender my plan to control my life. I needed to let go of my judgment and opinions of what is good and bad. For years, I judged Western medicine as evil because of what I saw. I was scared of its side effects. Later, I realized that allopathic and holistic medicine go hand in hand. I can use what I learned through holistic medicine to detox and support my body to stay strong during my allopathic treatments. I started to pray for my chemo and said to my medicine that I received all the benefits and let go of all the negative side effects.
I surrendered my belief system about what is good vs. bad medicine and embraced chemotherapy and other treatments without claiming all the negative side effects. I had to say, it seemed to work. During chemo, I never had nausea (except for the one time I ate movie theater popcorn the day after chemo). I never vomited or had a fever or diarrhea. Yes, I had hot flashes, body aches, and weakness, but I am slowly reversing that! I used what I learned in my 2 years of holistic medicine journey to support my organs to thrive during chemo and treatment.
So, if you are on the same journey, don’t forget to address your emotional trauma. I thought I was healed after years of prayers and church counseling, but the fact that my body was still producing cancer just proved that I still had a big issue. Granted, we may never be truly healed, but if I genuinely have released my trauma and forgiven the people involved, I shouldn’t be triggered all the time. It was easier for me to follow the physical treatment because it is scarier to address the deep pain of my childhood wounds.
I also learned I needed to stop comparing my story with others on the same journey. Yes, they may be cute because of A to Z, but every cancer is different, and every person has their own story. I can adapt some of the principles of healing, but in the end, I am the director and main character of my own life and story, and I need to embrace it fully!
Thanks – so, what else should our readers know about your work and what you’re currently focused on?
I was an occupational therapist who worked in a major rehabilitation hospital before my diagnosis. After getting diagnosed with cancer – I was employed as a clinical specialist for a pneumatic pump company (lymphedema pump). However, effective the summer of this year, my company (which was a startup) shut down due to budget cuts, and I am now officially unemployed. Before my diagnosis, I specialized in cancer rehabilitation (especially breast cancer and head and neck cancer) and lymphedema management. I am also an Occupational Therapist specializing in neuro rehab and have seen many patients with stroke, TBI, spinal cord injury, and neurodegenerative conditions. I am now looking to start my practice once I get a little stronger to help others through myofascial release and other bodywork, including shockwave therapy, lymphatic therapy, and neuro rehab. I found that all those modalities were beneficial on my healing journey, and I can’t wait to help others with the skills I’ve learned; in my last workshop, I learned a new bodywork technique called the PerFaCT method. In short, this approach uses bodywork with a shockwave device (percussive technology) to release the fascia and open up the limb of the system to help release emotional trauma. I released many emotions during the certification, but they didn’t hurt as deeply. I remember my colleague was working on my quads with the machine, and that took me back to my surgery experience (I had 3 scars from the JP drain on my groins)! I felt so much lighter after I thought we underestimated how much our subconscious stored our trauma in our body and our soul! I think what sets me apart from others is my curiosity to learn. When working at the rehab hospital, whenever I hit a wall, I would try to find creative solutions or learn a new way to help my patients. I asked my colleagues and friends to teach me and took many courses to help me master those skills. I don’t think I will ever stop learning and asking questions!
Please talk to us about happiness and what makes you happy.
I am happy when I spend time with my family and loved ones. I cherish every moment because I realize that life is a vapor that can derail quite quickly, so I cherish every memory. I also love to travel because I experience all the beautiful places and experiences I don’t usually see and feel! Finally, I am also happy when I can contribute to someone else’s healing. I hate seeing people in pain, and if I can help them, that brings me joy. However, I used to tie my worth to whether or not I was successful with that – so my motive was probably still selfish. If I were successful, then it helped me feel better about myself. Now, I can let go of that agenda and help from my heart. I still help and do my best, but I no longer try to control the outcome. Whether or not I’m successful will motivate me to learn, but I no longer attach my value to that!
Contact Info:
- Website: www.thelymphtherapist.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_lymph_therapist?igsh=MWdrZ2pmcDBqcHdvMQ%3D%3D&utm_source=qr
