Today we’d like to introduce you to Emily Phelps
Hi Emily, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today?
My personal story is beautiful and empowering, filled with struggle and overcoming challenges. It has been and will always be a healing journey. I believe I was meant to help others do the same with their struggles. Born in the rough neighborhood of inner-city South St. Louis, I witnessed violence firsthand and peripherally, never feeling safe. We also had many foster children in my home growing up (21 throughout the first 10-years of my life) which gave me an extra glimpse into some aspects of the darkness the world contains; parents unable or unwilling to get the help they need in order to care for their own children.
I learned about the painful facets of Narcissistic abuse throughout my life; from one of my parents (although I did not know it yet) and later in relationships with men. I dated abusive men, married and divorced a highly malignant narcissistic partner and after that, finally took the time to heal and process. In my search for answers, there was not enough information out there. The psychological community mostly gives up on cluster B personality types and doesn’t research enough. I knew I needed to bring more awareness to this epidemic of manipulation and the destruction of people from the inside out. Many people argue this is worse than physical violence as it eviscerates your identity in a stealth-like way.
Navigating through life, I moved around a lot -17 times- in my adulthood. I lived in Northern California and the Bay Area for around 10 years where I began pursuing my Master’s degree in clinical psychology at Pepperdine University through their intensive online program. After that, I had the opportunity to fulfill a dream of mine, to live in New York City. I left Brooklyn in August of 2020 after having gone through what felt like a tremendous trauma, witnessing a broken city crumble. I finally found myself in Austin, Texas. I graduated from Pepperdine and completed my practicum here in Austin at a local non-profit, Capital Area Counseling.
My journey is full of adventure and experiences that equipped me with an acute lens into people and their struggle. I am a life-long learner and am blessed to have had such experiences, difficult and wonderful, to allow me deeper understanding into the infinite complexities of the human condition. Once I began seeing clients, I knew without a doubt that I was made for this. I thoroughly enjoy helping others navigate their struggles to find hope and create change. It is truly an honor to be able to walk beside my clients to the other side of pain. I continue to focus heavily on the aspects of life I know personally too well: Narcissistic Abuse, Complex Trauma and all of the ways this can show up in a person and affect relationships. I enjoy seeing couples as well to facilitate re-constructing a stronger bond. Traumas from our past have a way of pushing in to every future connection. Our defenses are powerful and they create blinders to protect us. Part of my work is to be a mirror and gently uncover what was once used as a barrier can be set aside. The life of vulnerability is worth pursuing. It takes courage and is worth every step it takes.
Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
Do smooth roads exist? Everything since childhood on has been a series of unpredictable challenges. Moving around the country proved difficult. Working full-time while pursuing my degree was a major hurdle, divorcing a narcissist and healing, navigating my own complex trauma, and then jump-starting my private practice on my own was – and still is – a bumpy road. However, the lessons I have learned about my strength and ability have taught me that I can overcome any obstacle. Resilience and endurance are some of my most cherished qualities that I get the honor of helping clients achieve it for themselves.
As you know, we’re big fans of Your Future Self Therapy. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about the brand?
My private practice is called Your Future Self Therapy because I think it is so important to focus on how therapy shapes you into your future self. Your future self is the version of you that is self-compassionate and understands more of what made you are who you are and how to become who you want to be. Most people with complex trauma have an equally complicated sense of identity. There are painful memories that created defenses shaping how the world looks within and outside of the self. These are the things we identify in therapy and foster a method to curate the self moving forward. We didn’t get to choose who we were made into as children, but we do have the opportunity to choose who we become along the way to becoming our future selves.
I specialize in complex trauma. This can stem from childhood abuse, neglect, a narcissistic parent, and an emotionally immature parent. It can lead to a continuation of abusive relationships and can even form personality disorders and maladaptive behaviors. I work to help those identify what happened and how their core beliefs were created and maintained. Re-shaping the narrative of their life to create a journey they are proud of. Full of strength, resilience, and balance, the future does not have to be a repeat of the past.
In addition, I help couples who have trouble communicating and identifying their individual needs, usually due to one or both having a history of trauma. Projecting pain onto their partner is a common way that couples create conflict and sustain it. I work to bring a sense of ownership to them as individuals and shed light on how their behaviors are interfering with the life they want to lead.
As someone who has personally overcome the pain from broken relationships and complex trauma, it makes me uniquely able to have empathy for each person’s journey. I care deeply for their experiences and want to show my clients they are seen. I am very proud of the work I am able to do and honored to be part of their story. I have seen significant transformation and hope through my years and continue to see beautiful change.
The many ways trauma can show up in a person are reflected in attachment issues, perfectionism, self-criticism, hypervigilance, OCD, dissociation, anxiety and depression, among many others. These are all conditions I am familiar with and want to help people understand the root to be able to work toward healing.
What would you say have been one of the most important lessons you’ve learned?
My most important lesson is to keep going. Today is not tomorrow. What is happening now will not always be. To look forward and push on. Learn from where I was and keep pursuing great things because life is too short to be stuck. This lesson has allowed me to accept things and also grow significantly into who I want to become. It is also a never-ending process and I simply have worked too hard to get where I am, I cannot give up on myself.
Pricing:
- $130 for individual sessions
- $175 for couples sessions
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.yourfutureselftherapy.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourfutureselftherapy/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61558648844940
