Today we’d like to introduce you to Kelsey Daniels
Hi Kelsey, please kick things off for us with an introduction to yourself and your story.
Growing up my identity as an athlete was everything to me. I learned early on that performance and obedience were “key” to getting playing time and receiving any sort of attention or praise. I also grew up with a lot of abuse, all of which I normalized.
I later went on to play divison-one lacrosse at The University of Connecticut. It was there and during that time that the pressures of performance, coupled with a sincere lack of self-worth or confidence led to a severe decline in my mental health.
Then, one day in one of my classes, my professor mentioned the term “sugar baby.” Painting the picture that it was fairly common for college aged women to go out on “dates” with men in exchange for money. I figured it sounded like an opportunity to do something outside of my regimented routine on campus and to gain some pocket money in the process. And with that, I went on to begin to nevigate the dark parts of the internet.
I was naiive and went on to be groomed by men who told me I was smart, beautiful and funny. It was not long before these men began sexually exploiting me, and just like all instances of abuse up to that point, I normalized it.
By 2019, I had moved to Texas and eventually began to work as an escort, convinced that I was the smartest girl in the world now having figured out a way to monetize the work I was doing for years at the direction of men, and most often, for free.
It was not until 2021, that a–at the time–client pointed me in the direction of a church. I had begun some self-development work around this time, but even still, I dismissed the idea of church. I eventually just went so I could “rule it out” as an option, and also to get him to stop bugging me about going.
Everything about church and what was being taught was in direct contradiction with what I knew–with what a lifetime of grooming had led me to beleive. I continued to live in both worlds for a while, working as an escort and then going to church on Sundays. It worked for a while, but overtime thinking deeply about the words written in the Bible, and spoken in sermons, if offered me hope, encouragement and changes in perspective. The parables led me to think critically about the beliefs I held.
Jesus truly renewed my mind and transformed my heart. I began to see the truth behind my self-deceptions, false-identities I held and what I fundamentally believed to be right and wrong. I essentially had to dismantle and rebuild my entire belief system.
There came a point where I could no longer deny that there was a God, and that He did love me, that even in the life of sin, He still saw me as a daughter, just one who was wayward.
In my memoir, “Folly: The Memoir of a Call Girl Saved by Grace,” I discuss the narrative surrounding my journey in to sex work, and the struggle I had removing myself from it for good. I tell the story of how my beliefs regarding not only sex work shifted, but views about myself and the world shifted as well. It is my hope that my book offers encouragement to others who may be struggling with their identity, intimacy, who may have experienced abuse, or even those who may just be seeking to enter into a faith-based life, or grow in their faith.
Jesus did something radical in my life, and if my story can help someone on their own journey, that it will have already served it’s purpose.
Today, I work in the technology industry in Customer Success. I love my job because get to everyday put into practice the pillars of truth, vision, structure and strategy that led me out and away from the former version of myself. In those years of confronting myself, the trauma I had buried, the shame I harbored, God instilled within me an unbreakable resiliency that has left me confident, empowered and more than anything else, compassionate and in constant pursuit of truth and justice.
I believe that regardless of the cards one is dealt, or the magnitude of one’s messiness, we are always one decision–our next one–away from transformation.
I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?
I have had to learn to accept that I can not rewrite my history, or erase this mistakes I have made, only that I can choose to be intentional with the choices I make moving forward based on the beliefs I now have.
I wish I could say that forgiving many of my abusers was the most difficult part of the journey, but the most challenging part was being able to truly forgive myself. For the lifetime of poor decisions, false-beliefs and the years of backsliding back into sex work, and into old patterns and ways of life; even after I realized they were not good for me.
My failure to keep these commitments to myself only strengthened my self-doubt. It lowered my confidence and repeatedly caused me to question my faith.
I have had to adopt new habits, lifestyle changes, but mostly, fall in love with the process of strengthening my mind.
It was the small, compounded victories that slowly instilled in me confidence, which overtime fostered endurance in my faith and gave me hope that my future might hold something better than what the present held.
Can you tell our readers more about what you do and what you think sets you apart from others?
I work in Customer Success in the Data Center space where I help customers solution their desired objectives and meet their needs and goals. I manage a portfolio of customers with various needs in a rapidly evolving environment.
One of the most rewarding parts of my job is working with my customers in order to truly understand their unqiue objectives and company goals in order to drive, expand and grow their business.
I am most proud of my ability to lead with confidence, boldness and see situations objectively. I am grateful for the way God has shaped my character, allowing me to problem-solve, help others and have a direct impact on another’s business operations.
Author’s Note/Disclaimer for FOLLY – “Before you embark on this reading experience, it’s essential to acknowledge that the content of this book touches upon sensitive and challenging themes such as abuse, mental health struggles and trauma. As such, it may not be suitable for younger readers or those who may find such topics distressing. I approach these topics with honesty and with the intention of shedding light on the human experience, and to foster empathy and understanding around difficult discussions. As you navigate through the chapters of this memoir, I encourage you to proceed with caution and self-care. ”
What were you like growing up?
I was very shy as a result of a lot of the abuse. I lived in a state of fear and fight-or-flight and many adults would ask my parents if I was mute. I didn’t have many friends and was bullied throughout my high-school years, but at the same time was a great athlete.
I hid behind my identity as an athlete, and the “tough” mindset that are engrained into athletes at a young-age which allowed me to disregard my mental health and the negative feedback loop that plagued me. Instead I threw my frustratuion into investing more time practicing my sports and conditioning for them.
Most people do not believe me when I tell them this. Public speaking and presenting infront of customers is a large part of my current role at my company, as is, leading meetings or presenting throughout various facets of the company. It is hard to believe that I am the same person. One, who would drop college classes that involved public speaking, to today, loving any and every opportunity I have to share how Jesus radically transformed me and as a result, my life.
Pricing:
- FOLLY: The Memior of a Call Girl Saved by Grace, $24.99, Hardcover
- FOLLY: The Memior of a Call Girl Saved by Grace, $17.46, Audiobook on Audible
- FOLLY: The Memior of a Call Girl Saved by Grace, $9.99, Kindle
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.kelseydaniels.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kels.dans/
Image Credits
Images are all Drew Elaine Photography
