We recently had the chance to connect with Tanja Ross and have shared our conversation below.
Tanja , really appreciate you sharing your stories and insights with us. The world would have so much more understanding and empathy if we all were a bit more open about our stories and how they have helped shaped our journey and worldview. Let’s jump in with a fun one: What are you most proud of building — that nobody sees?
I’m most proud of building my memoir. It took me ten years of writing and just showing up for the page again and again. Nobody saw the countless drafts or the intense emotional work behind it. That discipline taught me how to stay consistent on long-term goals, even when there’s no immediate recognition.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
My name is Tanja Ross, though many know me by my moniker, Sleepy. I grew up in Germany in a world of séances and unconventional healing. When my family moved to Los Angeles, I became a child street performer on Hollywood Boulevard and the main breadwinner, chasing my mother’s dream of fame. By twelve, I was living apart from my parents and navigating the foster care system. Out of that chaos came my memoir, Fame or Dead, a book ten years in the making. It’s a story of survival and the cost of growing up in delusion, but also of transforming pain into purpose. At its core, it’s less about fame and more about the courage it takes to break free from unhealthy family dynamics.
Okay, so here’s a deep one: What was your earliest memory of feeling powerful?
When I was nine, just before my tenth birthday, my mother gave me twenty dollars to buy a toy. Instead, I spent it on a dance video so I could learn hip hop and street perform, helping my immigrant family cover the bills. Before long, I had become our primary breadwinner. No child should carry that kind of weight, but I made a grown-up decision that, for a time, kept us from homelessness. I’m proud of myself.
When did you stop hiding your pain and start using it as power?
I nearly gave up when my brother Slava ended his life, worn down by the same nomadic, witchy, street-busking existence we endured after coming to America in pursuit of my mother’s dream of fame. The grief was unbearable, but I knew it wasn’t yet my time. The stubborn survivor in me held on, and the only way forward was to transform that pain into something: a podcast, a book, a story. When you’ve been through that kind of pain, creating becomes less of a choice and more of a lifeline.
Next, maybe we can discuss some of your foundational philosophies and views? What important truth do very few people agree with you on?
An important truth I believe in, one that not many people are comfortable agreeing with, is that silence protects harm. Too many remain quiet about their deepest wounds to preserve the so-called ‘family unit’ and its outward image. When I wrote my memoir, I faced pressure not to speak about the abuse, manipulation, and mental health struggles my family wanted hidden. But secrecy only sustains pain. Protecting abusers at the expense of victims has to end. Speaking out isn’t just acceptable, it’s essential. Shame may try to silence us, but true healing only begins when we bring our truths into the light. Even when the abuser is someone we love…because love and harm can, tragically, exist at the same time.
Before we go, we’d love to hear your thoughts on some longer-run, legacy type questions. Are you doing what you were born to do—or what you were told to do?
I was told to chase Hollywood, to sing, act, and perform until fame became the measure of my worth. For years, I carried that pressure as though it were destiny. But what I’ve come to realize is that the things I loved as a child like reading, writing, and telling stories were my true calling all along.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.tanja-ross.com
- Instagram: sleepwalkeronline
- Youtube: sleepwalkeronline
- Soundcloud: sleepwalkeronline
Image Credits
Thomas Ocovos
